I just decided to detransition
Submitted Oct. 16, 2021, 11:19 p.m. by GasparEtLisaI was diagnosed with Gender Dysphoria (GD for short) but realized after becoming envious of women that going on T to look like a man was not the answer. I wasn't on T long so I don't have many long term effects but GD was very hard for me to deal without T. Is there anyone who has GD and instead of transitioning found an alternative outside of T? I really don't want to become plagued by GD again, so I really need to find an alternative/coping mechanisms.
7 comments recovered from the Pushshift database.
It may sound silly but I’ve always been into character creation, and creating a DND character could help give you the outlet you need to see yourself through the lens of a character. Sometimes I use Pinterest to build on my style and use it as a reference for my wardrobe. There are definitely alternatives to transition like cosplay and creating artwork of what you’d like to be/look.
Working out is a good distraction, plus it keeps you healthy and provides/increases dopamine.
bulk
Not to be a dick, but my biggest advice is always to touch grass. Log off. Stop spending all your time online and with trans people, obsessively posting and talking about transition. Seek out friendships with cis females. Stop staring at pictures of men and making yourself jealous. You will never look or act exactly like them, no matter how much hrt or surgeries you get so holding yourself up to that ideal will only bring disappointment.
Start caring for your body. If you don't have an exercise routine, start one. If you eat trash all the time, start a healthier diet (not with the goal to lose weight per se, but with the goal being to just be healthier). Start meditating if that's something you're into. Journal a lot. Seek out a therapist that will challenge you instead of just affirm affirm affirm.
Honestly, T is the easy way out. Treating your dysphoria in other ways is the hard part but way worth it. Because instead of changing your body, which has nothing wrong with it at all, you're changing your thoughts. You're treating the actual mental illness and that hurts and it sucks and it takes a lot of work. But you will be much happier in the long run. T destroys your body so if you can avoid using it, so much the better
I don't really associate with the trans community or obsessively talking about transition I wrote multiple short memiors about my struggle with Gender Dysphoria. I have a therapist that challenged me for multiple years, and I care for my body by overcoming a binge eating disorder that was onsited by the anxiety my Gender Dysphoria caused, eating healthy and exercising. My Gender Dysphoria made it hard to care for my body yet I did, but my Gender Dysphoria still causes me to suffer. When I took testosterone I didn't do it as an "easy way out" I did it because it seemed like my only option to ever recover and feel OK in my body for once. But on it, it didn't help me since instead of affirming my dysphoria, it dulled it so my woman parts seemed less foreign or aliean as I processed/saw them diffrectly (ex: my breasts seemed more like excess fat then actual breasts), so I could tolerate my female features and enjoy my femine body WHILE they changed to become more masculine. Using "mindset" only went so far for me and I heavily dissociated from my feelings and myself simply to avoid Gender Dysphoria, making me have tics (since I couldn't process my feelings) and ruined my memory (since I dissociated). Going back and letting my estrogen levels start to recover is really scary for me, especially when my Gender Dysphoria is confirmed to be corolated with my estrogen levels, and on T I was able to leave my disscoiation episode and start to mentally recover, only to mentally deteriote again as I wished that I diddnt have to change or do anything for my body, while everyone else doesnt. I wish it just diddnt feel like i'm not supopsed to be female, cause truly and forever I have fought and tolerated it to this day as best as I can (which is why I decided to detransition, to see if I have one final chance at tolerating it now that im almost an adult and matured) with professional help and family support yet I still struggle with it- and I don't believe I can live as a normal woman as long as my Gender Dysphoria can never truly be cured. I'm trying to seek a treatment where I can be somewhat at peace with my natural body since I know T caused me to be confused, or maybe I just forgot how bad my dysphoria was without treatment since it's been 3 years on hormone blockers, and 20~ weeks on T, and I just want to know if T is the ideal treatment for someone like me with chronic Gender Dysphoria. I'm trying to see if other trans people with Gender Dysphoria seeked an alternative treatment that helped them be at peace with their natural body, instead of changing it to gain opposite sex characteristics and affirm to their Gender Dysphoria. I have one body and I wish to do the best for it, but also so that it's hard to tolerate Gender Dysphoria without my mental health plunging into the void. I really want to try everything before I permently remove anything, like maybe have a breast reduction to reduce my breasts dysphoria (which I don't know if it'll even work since I still have breasts) instead of top surgery, or going on birth control to stop my period (it diddnt work before, but it might if I try another brand??), so I can tolerate and live with my natural body more despite Gender Dysphoria. My Gender Dysphoria is related to my estorgen levels, and what estrogen had done to my body. T helped reverse and fought back what estrogen fought back to my body and make me feeling more comofortable in it, but since it made me more comfy in my body as a female I decided to stop taking it. It's a hard and confusing journey to figure out the best treatment, but I know without treatment my life is at forfeit since I was basically disabled without treatment, I couldnt hug people, I couldnt sleep, I couldnt play soccer or run or hang out with friends since my body felt so aliean and the feeling so opressive that I secluded myself to avoid those intense feelings of dysphoria, and that selcusion was my best coping mechanism, and treatment really did help me open up and feel happier and better in my body, yet I fear it's not the most ideal solution which is why im looking at other options. I don't want to fuck up. I'm really, really trying my best. Please don't say I was taking the "easy way out" because I truly diddnt want to go down this route. I never wanted to be a man, or be a transman, I did it to cope with my Gender Dysphoria, and it helped, it did, but I'm scared of permanent change. I never asked to have Gender Dysphoria. I never asked to suffer like this.
Obviously i don't know your story. It was not my intention to be dismissive. I was mostly implying that generally, T is the easy way out. It's way easier to decide that a person has dysphoria (even if they have other things going on) and that HRT and surgeries are the only and obvious cure. It's way harder to actually dive deep into actually what causes your dysphoria (how much of it is internalized misogyny, for example) and treat it in another way. It's harder to every day try to deprogram and question your misogyny than it is to take an injection every other week or whatever and avoid thinking too deeply about things.
Without knowing your actual story, the only advice I could give was by necessity general. I was more saying in general that's what's going on. I apologize for coming off as dismissive. There are a lot of posts very similar to yours that ask the same question(s) over and over again, so i try to give pretty much the same advice.
If you have tried everything that I have suggested and in earnest then maybe HRT is the route for you. There are no easy answers, unfortunately. Others may disagree but I do think that HRT can be a valid treatment. I just think it should be the last resort.
You are still so so so young. You don't have to have it all figured out. If you're really nervous about T, then don't do it. Wait until you're older and have matured more. You can always go on it later.
Again I'm sorry for coming across as dismissive or rude.
You weren't, and your advice is both sound and rock solid.
2nding that OP seriously considers these two posts and set their emotions aside for a moment.