When people say it's harder for boys and men to speak up about their experiences of sexual assault, I think of the girls and women who are forcibly married to their rapist to absolve him of his crime, I think of the women living in countries where men can legally rape their wives, I think of the women who are killed for "cheating" on their husband by being raped, I think of the women who are arrested for prostitution while their rapist pimps and clients walk free. For women too, the social repercussions of opening up about sexual assault are immense.

So I wonder. Is it really easier for women to speak up about sexual assault? Don't women feel ashamed and dishonored? Don't women blame themselves for not "fighting back"? Or for drinking too much, or for taking a walk alone at night, or for trusting him, or for dressing up "sexy"? Aren't women accused of lying? Aren't women scared of not being believed? Or have we just become so desensitized to women's pain that when we hear yet another story of a woman being raped, we just convince ourselves that it mustn't be as hard for her as it is for men since it happens to women all the time anyway.